So I put my foot through my bedroom ceiling yesterday…. Perhaps I should explain that because I’m feeling so strong and the cooler weather has always brought out the DIYer in me, I decided to change the lightbulb in the downlighter in the shower. Simple job, right? The bulb appeared to be rusted in, which of course meant getting into the roof and trying to remove the entire light fitting. I should have stopped when I felt tired just bringing the stepladder in from the laundry. I’ve never been good at knowing when to stop. After I’d remembered the first rule of being inside a roof – step only on the trusses – I stopped, cleaned up the debris and put the ladder away.
I did Codewords for three hours to still my beating heart.
It was fabulous to do a little walk with Kathy and Sharon on Saturday morning, from the Farmer’s Market in Assegai. It felt like old good times getting up in the dark, and putting on walking gear in time to be ready for Sharon to pick me up. Like going to races and all the fun we had with those. It took me a while to track down all my walking bits and pieces. I’d even forgotten how to start my watch! K and S were very gracious and sacrificed their 8km up Alveston hill, to do a slow 4 with me. Granted they’d done 30kms on their bikes on Friday, and claimed sore legs but I know those two – they go and go and go. It was delightful to have breakfast at the market and buy some great veggies, as we chatted. Special.
Being off the chemo is strange. We’d made such massive changes in routine and everything was governed by body functions/dysfunctions and medical visits, that it’s quite difficult to be ‘normal’ again. It’s fabulous to be able to get up in the morning and be ready for work in an hour, to walk to the gate without thinking about noodly legs and to have enough of an appetite to plan meals. Food tastes really good and I’ve put on another kg since we got back. Yet I find myself speeding up again and not stopping to notice the light on the leaves and the flowers. I have to remind myself to feel grateful for how good I’m feeling and how blessed I am in my life. So between the gladness for strength and relative health and the memory of the nightmare of the diagnosis, there is a place for missing the sensitivity that comes from noticing every breath. I get reminded by my fingers and toes which still tingle all the time from the chemo damage – at least they don’t zing in the cold!
Like at work – I’m kind of scared of taking on any project that requires me to be reliable, because I just can’t predict what will happen next. The team is amazing, Gita, Mari, Bwalya, Pregs and Denise have covered the gaps for 6 months and graciously have edged over to fit me back in more permanently again. Shubs, Sibongile, Bwalya and Joan have kept MPR/TES alive and well and fun. It’s taking me a while to find the rhythm again.
Isn’t Durban beautiful at this time of the year? I call them Diamond Days – clear, all the edges are so sharp, warm yet cool at the same time.
We have a new batch of lettuce seedlings coming up in our planters. I didn’t know that lettuce will grow now. Also while we were in Oz, Alphaeus transplanted tomato plants sowed by the birds into the rose planters. Both the roses and the tomatoes seem to be very happy sharing their tubs, new buds on the roses and a massive crop of jam tomatoes are on their way. The rocket and the swiss chard are thriving, and the cucumber and eggplants both have fruits growing.
There’s a season to everything.